Lonely Cow On A Hill

Wad is this life we are leading?

2005-07-25T01:43:00.000-07:00

Too many times, we have failed, too many times we seek to hide in the dark cos it was so much easier than to look into the light. Only when we decide on the right path to take, will we realise tat it is worse, but getting there in the end is the Ultimate reward tat we can rejoice in.

Went to Church on Sunday, and they had these kids singing, felt the song really made a impact on me and my sleepy tots tat morning. I almost didnt go to church cos i felt tired and i was hoping and finding a reason not to go.

"In God's name i have come to u,
to share wad he has told me to,
Freely freely,
You have recieved,
Freely Freely,
You shall give."

I have been blessed in many ways by Him, but so often i have not been grateful.
In life, studies, sports, relationships, when we succeed we tend to forget how we got there, and above all, who helped us there. We take all the credit to ourselves and sometimes teammates, but inside, we are so happy cos WE DID it. God helped us there, pls remember tat.

The sermon was kinda relaxed, funny, yet very insightful. He spoke about how songs, and relationships nowadays are so empty and meaningless, then he proceeded to sing " She loves me . LALALA..." ( a popular song ) and also how we celebrate X'mas, the New Year, we go out, get drunk, party all nite, probably hoping to get laid or meet tat someone who we can fling with, w/o knowing the importance of the festive, instead of giving thks and spending a real heartfelt fellowship with our loved ones, we proceed to Sin to celebrate.

A mission family who died on the plane back to Nepal after attending a course in Bible Studies, the wife wrote this letter b4 she left:
" It isnt easy living in Nepal, i could tell u how difficult life is here.
i could tell u, how bad the roads are.
I could tell u, how hard it is to educate the people here.
I could tell u, how bad the food is here.
I could tell u, how bad is it to educate my children here
and i could tell u 1000000 more bad things tat i dun like or cant get used to.
BUT,
i wanna tell u,
the joy of being able to share God's word with these people.
I wanna tell u, the joy of getting acceptance from the people who were so hostile thru the grace of God.
I wanna tell you, about the times we as a family have learnt to bond stronger and get closer to each other"

And after she died, many people said why did God let her go? And after much prayer, the Pastor said " If she were to write us a letter from heaven this would be wad it sounds like.."

"I could tell u about, the last few mins tat we realised tat the plane was going to crash.
I could tell u about, how sad i was, when i knew this was the last time i was gonna hug my kids and husband.
I could tell u about, the last few secs before the crash,
the thoughts tat went thru my mind, about all of u, my family, those tat i have not said wad i need to say.
I could tell u about, the pain thru the crash, watching my kids getting torn to pieces.
But,
WAD i wanna share, is the LOve and Joy here in Heaven,
WAd i wanna share, is that Things dun hurt anymore, cos He is here with us,
WAd i wanna share, is tat God Loves and Is waiting,
WAd i wanna share, is tat God wept when we shunned him,
Wad i wanna share, is tat God still combs ur hair with the wind, even though u hurt him,
WAd i wanana share, is tat God has prepared a place for all of us here,
WAd i wanna share, is tat God IS Love, and so should we."

Isnt it always easy to focus on the pain, the sadness? cos tats wad we always do, and Satan wants us to fear and lose all faith and hide in the darkness. God says, u have done wrong, i have punished u, now learn from my ways and reach for the gift tat i have shared with u.

Here is a lil verse to read up on 1 Corinthains chapter 13, about Love and wad it means.

2005-07-04T07:02:00.000-07:00

Been so long since i posted anything.. this address was supposed to be of 2 persons, but now, it belongs only to me and the name makes sense still, its still juz me and moo... juz tat both also me.. haha..

I am not here to tell u how bad i feel or angry or any emotional stuff, whether or not, i am looking for pity or people to say nice things and console me, becos as humans i know people will still do so.

She has moved on to seek for emotional support or wad eva she may call it in her world.. but while she said tat she contacts all those old frens, go out in the middle of the nite is to fill up that emptieness.. is it true? Should i do so as well? is it right? will i lead some others on instead..?Frens will always say things such as "call us when u wanna go out" when u got no money will they give u unconditionally? "Just do wad u think is right.. we will be behind u!" my stand is, then why do we judge others when they do something we dun like? Serial murderers, Kuresh (cult leader who asked his members to kill themselves), car and sucicidal bombers.. they all believed wad they did was right.. but the hurt they caused, those tat support will rejoice, yet wad about those tat were hurt or had loved ones killed? Were they right too?

Anyway, i watched Inital D, nice but dumb.. Jay was a victim of the word "Love" too, he only knew to do wad she said was right.. In the end, he realised tat somethings u can never control no matter how hard u try. Wad u feel u try real hard, is never enuff for someone else and when u try to match up to theirs, they change again or they show to u tat they aint perfect too..

I made a break thru in my bowling too, got a 869 series. Not a bad try, for someone who is so confused with his own game.. haha.. will work to better tat soon...And i was part of a team who won the GRC tournament 1-2 weeks ago.. not much actually, it was kinda crap and no fight kinda tourny.. will look forward to kick some ass.. real ass.

To those who read this blog, u are obligated to ur own tots and opinions, so go ahead and type in my tagboard if u wan.. will attempt to maintain this blog more frequently. Thks to those who support my blog by reading...

+ PooF +

2005-06-18T20:28:00.000-07:00

Gone is the old owner.... Sob Sob~~

I have come to take over this address so as to keep it as a memory..

Would u like to join Me for Dinner? As Dinner?

KILLER COW ROAMING~~

Will update again soon.... come back and see again in a couple of days~~